Friday, June 27, 2003

...

i..
have been thinking.
but a lot of my thoughts have somehow dispersed into my surroundings and into nothing.
let's just say that my head is a messy void. if that's possible.

i think i'm going mad.
well. madder than i already am, in that case.
so many things i wanna flush outta my system now but i can't.
why?
dunno.

was pondering over some things.
people love to regret.
they like to look back and think:
what if i did something else? would it be better?
what if i -had- done this? would the situation have been any different?
what if i hadn't done this? what if i could have done this but i didn't?
why why why?

do not regret.
what's done is done.
over.
what more can you do?
travel faster than the speed of light to somehow go back in time?
even so, that might not end up turning back time, but simply making it much slower than it is.

it will pass over faster if you are happy.
i try to be happy now.
i am trying.
make jokes out of shit.
try to laugh when people are crying. not laugh at them or laugh crudely of cos.
i mean, don't they say that laughter's the best medicine?

arh. i dunno.
i have no idea what i'm doing now either.
what do i want? am i trying too hard? is it a futile effort?
plus.
exams are coming.
ugh. i am like only 10% there.
someone. ready the slaughterhouse.
...and dith babbled on at the insane hour of 9:49:00 PM